Just looking back...

Once again here i am, reading my own words and feeling embarrassed but also yearning to be back there once again. I deleted my previous "about me" little descriptions] but it basically said "here i am world fresh out of high school lets go!" its been a year since my last post and in the course of a year worked on the slope, i experienced a job that few people can say they've experienced, decided the money wasnt worth it, i've been to only a semester of college in byu-idaho, fell in with a bad crowd decided i couldnt trust myself too far away from home, moved back got a contract with the glenwood apartments of provo, had some amazing roommates that reminded me of what fun should really look like, had struggles and revelations and here i am still in my apartment working in a scale house for sunroc going day after day thinking time has forgotten me but the future is right on the horizon i need to shake off the dust and start preparing for it.
Its funny how when you dont have big plans or goals in the near future you feel like you drift off into the oblivion of time floating around doing your daily routine but not really "being" there.. everyone has a purpose, the trouble is seeing it clearly and knowing what you have to do to get there. Or for me its knowing and seeing but thinking "that day is too far away it'll take forever for me to get there, i think i'll just float around some more" to be honest i dont know how to get out of this funk, it comes and goes like an old friend the kind you dont look forward to being with but are obligated to entertain them once in a while because yall go way back, right? It comes from leaving behind the things that matter, and all thats left is the next day of work and living and i thank god for my family or where would i be without them? kind of a somber post, im hoping that no one reads this and im just entertaining my thoughts and imagination :P some things just have to be written and whats the point in writing if there's not a slight chance that someone might read it?

Thoughts before leaving?

Ok well tomorrow at five in the afternoon i will be leaving for anchorage alaska to train for a job while staying alone in a motel for a week before heading off to deadhorse alaska to work for two weeks doing odd jobs around a heavily machined refinery. My feelings of this event come as; sadness, excitment, nervousness, impatience, determined. I am one big mess of emotions, mostly because i'll be away from home for an entire summer and im not sure i can function without my parents (WHICH IS DISGUSTINGLY SAD) Then the other half is just pure determination to prove that i dont need to live at home and i can make it on my own. Its time to grow up kelsie and although my parents haven't properly prepared me for a life on my own i KNOW i can do it. I will most likely need their help throughout these next years but i just hate relying on anyone this much, they've done so much for me and i wish they wouldn't have to. i wish i could say "don't worry about it i got this" right now this goal of independence seems hopeless but its all i want as i emerge from a sheltered house with plenty of food, love, clothes, and the unecessary extras. i will find what i need to do to fill this hole or i will just continue to work for it. Tomorrow i take my first step towards this accomplishment.

Long time no see!?

Wow this page is in some serious need of updating but seeing as how i haven't been on, Le Blogger, in quite some time i completely forgot how it works and my blog spot is once again a scary page of computer stuff. Well it'll all work out i'm sure. Haha man! i've been reading my stuff and some of it i'm actually embarrassed to keep reading probably because a few people have told me that they actually read my blog!! ah way to go guys now i'm insecure about what i write. . . oh well! hmm i think this paragraph will be my welcome back writting sample so WELCOME BACK KELSIE! even if its only for a couple days. . . again.

The Arches

So this spring break i went to the arches with my family, which consisted of reece, brittany, me, mom, and dad, also accompanied by stephny Elsmore. skipping past eight hours of driving during the course of three days, it was really fun and i had a blast hiking, climbing, running, and getting freaked out from being so high up that i felt like i'd fall off the face of the earth if i so much as tripped a little too close to the edge. so i don't think anyone can really comprehend the "high" that i get out of going hiking its just so much fun i can't help but get excited. Especially when we're going into the desert like moab and i get to see the beautifull lanscaping it just takes my breath away. so the first picture shows you how extremely high we climbed at some points and the second is showing me and steph in the crack of huge boulders.

PROM

ok i got a pic! so anywayS, from the beginning. . .well for me this was a big thing because *of course* i've never been to a date dance or even gone on a real date. . . yeah sad but life goes on! so anywho prom starts to become a big thing at our school (meaning its coming up) well like any other dance i don't even notice or plan on going i actually start to plan fun stuff to do w/my other friends who don't plan on going! *YAY* but as it turns out my mom, steph and her mom had volunteered me for dress shopping (as if i was going to prom.) well we all went with reece and josh as judges ( i suppose) we each picked out some real nice elegant dresses. well maybe a week later i wake up to some kisses leading from my door to my bathroom with a bunch of rose pedals in my bath tub and written on the mirror was a note saying " now that i kissed the ground you walk on and bathed you in roses, will you go to prom with me?" it was real cute but that wasn't the end of it. when i got to school that morning, there was a note in the office telling me that if i wanted to know the name of the person that asked me to prom then i'd have to do something special in each class to eventually find his name. well long story short it was Josh Mckeachnie that asked me. It was the cutest thing that has ever been done for me and i could tell he went throug a lot. so skipping through a whole month or so. . . PROM!. . . so i wake up in the morning to fog horns and reece and josh yelling at me to get up! they give me two seconds to throw on a hoodie and head over to josh's house for breakfast. Afterwards they give us a treasure hunt clue to find out where our "Date" will be at. in the clue it gives us five minutes to go home get dresed and wash up. . .i was 45 seconds over. . . so this clue leads us to four games that we have to win before we find out where we're headed. so After we found out all the clues and did all the games the date at the end was . . . . . . "FOur WheeLing". . . . . and it was really fun. They brought a picnic which we ate at the top of this mountain/really tall hill, with an awsome view. so after like three and a half hours of wheeling we all packed up and went home to take shower's and get dressed up for our prom. Thanx To MINDY i was all "dude" up and Gorgeous. . .this was one of the few tines that i felt and knew that i looked amazing. . . so there was about and hour of picture taking, which was way fun, and then we went to our luxorious restaurant which had our own reserved tables. . . At Camper world with Bryant and KC as our waiter's, it was the funniest and cutest date i've ever *no joke Duh* been on. At the actuall dance the only part that was fun was the prominade and dancing with my brother in law for my daddy daughter dance. so even though the official "prom dance" was lame and stupid, the rest of the prom date was one of the best experiences i've ever had. . . which might mean that i've had very few experiences and that i don't get "out" much but at least my first date/prom was fun and exciting with a very nice date that was polite and considerate. . . well hopefully my future dates and last/next senior date dance will be as fun as this past one!

Draper Temple dedication

SO today i went to the draper temple dedication or (open house) i dont know what they call it. Anyway so i was privledged and had the oppertunity to walk through the temple. I got to see every room, which is amazing just to think of all the wonderfull things that go on in each of those rooms. Even though they haven't used the temple yet i get to say that i've been in those rooms....i try to imagine the amazing things that go on in this temple and i just can't even fathom what it must feel like. One day i will walk through all of the temple's rooms and that time it'll will be for participating, witnessing, and recieving all of the blessing that happen only in a temple.

Anyway what i was really wanting to say was how cool it was, walking through the temple just after its brand new and when it still has the smell of work lingering on it. My favorite of all the rooms where these two waiting rooms or something, i can't remember, but they had HUGE murals of scenery covering the entire room, every inch, and it was so beautifull it actually sincerely took my breath away... yep so ppl should hurry and visit before the oppertunity passes u by.

The HORROR!

Well as you can tell i'm a pretty awsome person in everyway, including dancing! Ha yeah right! so the dance did actually go pretty good even though we messed up soooooo bad, but the positive thing to do is just not think about the negative. Everything besides the "mess up" was amazing, except for this WEIRD COLIN kid, who thinks he's good at everything said that i had no emotion!!!! as you will soon find out....i killed him.....on accident of course..... ............JK i had someone else do it, I'm not a heartless killer. So ending on a happier note, I got Pulled Over.....wait actually thats not happy at all.....Yes i have been pulled over twice before today, but both times they just gave me a warning, because i'm so gooooood Looking they just can't resist me, except for this bozzo who gave me a ticket! YEAH I KNOW! well okay it goes like this......:I was taking reece and steph home because they didn't want to wait around in the church SO on the way home we were Jammin and i'm all like "hey you guys wanna go get an icecream at Wendys?!" and they were all like "UH YES!" so i was all like "SWEET" so i did an awsome spin out "U" turn and went to wendys and we all got shakes. Well because of the detour steph wasn't going to be home on time, BUT, the genius that i am, I said "OH YEAH?!" and it was on. i was a speed devil the whole way there that is until this car in the other lane passed me and then flipped their own U'eeeeee and started following me. we all kept saying that if i slowed down and turned on stephs road that he'd just leave. well since i wasn;t thinking strait from OD'ing on ADRENALINE......i missed her road and then i had to be stupid and slow down to 5 mph and put my blinker on and act like someone who's never drivin in their LIFE! so i got a ticket (75 in a 55mph lane) yep! BUT he docked it down to 60 because i'm still cute and irresistable.... LESSON: "dont listen when people tell you to go faster AND listen to that voice in your head thats saying "SLOW DOWN" it usually knows what its talkin about!" well yeah thats my whole day pretty amazing i know i wouldn't recommend doing it though... its pretty expensive!